Talking relationships

Nowadays I have a newfound interest in TED Talks. [I know they’re ancient on the internet! But I’m a late bloomer- net wise] The two main topics I like to hear on, are: 

 Nutrition – since it’s of my professional interest

 Relationships – since it’s of my personal interest

In fact, last night I came across a very beautiful talk by author of the famous book ‘Men are from Mars….’ – John Gray. The talk was fun, informative, & insightful. Although some people might find the talk a little like ‘stating the obvious’, but looking at the relationship failure rates nowadays, the obvious might no more be so obvious!!

We do know the rights from the wrongs- what’s good to foster a relationship and what’s not. Yet, our mental blocks, our past baggage stop us from expressing ourselves completely in our present relationships, or sometimes put the burden of our expectations on a single relationship.

Here’s what I feel is wrong with our ‘learning method’… Our childhood is spent mostly in schools, where we’re prepared for our professional lives. True, we make friends, we bond with people. But, we’re mostly left on our own in-built capacity to socialize.

We’re so busy teaching our kids, the importance of sharing and cooperating, that we forget the other important qualities to maintain good relationships. Somewhere, self-esteem, self-love, & self- respect get suppressed under “keeping your brothers before you”, “love thy neighbor”, & “compassion for all”.  And then we expect to have the perfect marriage, and family life as soon as we’ve fulfilled our professional goals. (Sometimes, even before that, for girls)

To be happy, professional success plays a part, definitely. But a major part is played by our relationships – to our parents, siblings, friends, romantic partner. So, our early life education should consist of more on inter-personal relationships than just putting students to work in teams, or ensuring good familial environment.

Yes, there are a few schools which have student- counselling bodies; or teachers, who can suggest good reads on such topics to students. But they’re just a handful in India. Every school should be bound to have such student support. That can happen, only if interpersonal skills are made a part of the curriculum.

True, our education system has come a long way in the past few generations. But, we’re still not fully equipped to give a wholesome life to our future citizens. Only awareness can bring about change. And it’s high time that we be aware of this flaw in our education system.

OK, enough of reflection! The good news is that, my daughter is all set to start school! We all are very excited! New dress, new shoes, new things, new books, new life! With the current realization about education, I plan to fill the void at my level. Very difficult! But challenge accepted!